Shout out

Hey. Shout out to whoever it is in New York that reads my blog. I don't think we are friends because I don't think I know anybody in New York. But hey...I appreciate you. Also thanks to anyone who still reads this with interest. There's a point where an online journal, aka this blog, cannot be an exact journal of my thoughts and feelings. Because some things are meant to be kept private. In today's social media world, I forget that sometimes. Shut up. Just stop talking. Nobody cares. You're still typing? Yes, self. I am. I'm not divulging any sweet gossip or feelings. If you're looking for that you're in the wrong place. What I am doing is wasting your time. And possibly my own since I am not quite on the edge of passing out. Instead, I am in bed with my book on my chest typing away. Perhaps trying to get to that point where I can immediately reach sleep. Perhaps because I enjoy pretending someone is listening to me at this exact moment. I do that sometimes. Sometimes? Sorry...most of the time. I pretend someone is listening to me speak right now. And, just like I think before I speak, I think before I type. But not enough to matter. At the risk of sounding creepy, I know the main people that read this. And I think of certain people when I type. And pretend I'm talking to them. Because this is easier than actually talking. This is easier than striking up an actual conversation. With actual topics. This is easier than dealing with consequences. This is easier than trying to decipher sincerity. This is easier than real life. Because real life can't leave anything open. Everyone has to finish their book and close it with full understanding. Before moving onto the next. But more than all of that...some things are just unspoken. Sometimes we just know. But most of the time, we don't act. We can type. But we can't choose. We eventually have to close the book. But why? I like leaving them open to the pages that I enjoyed the most. I fold them down and highlight them. Just in case there was something I missed. There always is. We always miss the most important part. The main objective. It's always better the second time around because we know more. We know what was. We know what is to come. But then we notice something in the present that we did not before. And that is the key to it all. If this makes sense, I'll be happy. Publish with no regrets. Ready, go.

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