Thoughts from an uncomfortable concrete wall

The other day I had absolutely nothing to do so I started a new quest. The motive is to find the most serene place on campus. So I drove up there, picked a spot, started blasting some music in my ears, and just started writing. This particular spot was on a concrete wall near the bell tower. Here is what I wrote.

Sometimes I wish my entire life could be a soundtrack. The appropriate music for the appropriate situations. Music can add so much impact to even the dullest of scenarios. Think about watching a movie without music. When something is sad, you need the slow piano track in the background going dada da da da dum..dum..dum. Not overpowering or infiltrating the scene, but just right. In a fast chase scene, the music is loud and heavy pumping you up for whatever is about to happen. Sometimes music can even hint at what will happen next such as in a scary movie when you hear a cresendo right before dude gets knifed. Why can't life be like that?

I'm sitting on campus now with soundproof headphones blaring Anberlin's latest, New Surrender. What a CD. It's 8 at night but there are still plenty of people about. Listening to music can give you a completely different outlook on life. People that I have never seen before are now a part of my life, if only for a few seconds. Walking to the beat of my sound track. A foreign guy just came and sat down on the wall next to me. Is he serious? I can't help but wonder why. There is a bench literally 10 feet away, not to mention hundreds of them around campus. But he sits right next to me. Probably close enough to read this. Maybe it's because he's lonely and like me, just needed to get out and see other people. I feel different from most people because after 5, I have no agenda. I haven't started work again, and I rarely study or go out. Everyone always seems to have an agenda. After one thing is finished, another task is immediately started. It is unfathomable to just sit here and just do absolutely nothing. Not even thinking about doing anything. Just...nothing. Well besides writing, but since these are my thoughts I'm not really noticing.

When you forget about your life, you start to notice things that before, were seemingly unexistant. Trees that you didn't know were there. A pattern in the sidewalk. Or maybe that Wurlitzer with a rotating speaker in the song your listening to. But the biggest thing for me is the sheer beauty of the situation. I can see the fountain from here in the distance. This campus looks great from this angle. I feel more relaxed than I have been in years. For a second I started to think about things I had to do tomorrow, then realized it didn't matter. People are staring me as they are walking by. Like someone sitting here with a pen and a notebook looking around is odd. I guess it is to them. They have an agenda.

Here's a question. If God created earth and the things on it for us to enjoy, why do we spend so little time in awe of it? Think about the complexity of the littlest thing such as a piece of bark in a flower bed. That came from a tree, which came from a tiny seed. Think of all the things that have to go right for that little seed to become an enormous tree. The water in the water fountain. How is it that 2 particles of hydrogen and one of oxygen can combine together and form the thing that nature needs most to live? What if that didn't happen naturally? When you think about the complexity of the universe and how everything fits together, there is no possible way that you can think it all evolved out of mass chaos. There was an explosion and the earth just happened to be at the EXACT right spot away from the sun and we could live on it. Right. Regardless everyone has gotten into this routine where they don't take time for themselves anymore. People forget what it's like to just sit and admire everything. To not worry about what's going on overseas, the economy, grades, or what you're going to wear. It is amazing. Relaxing.

It's starting to get cold, and me sitting here isn't helping. And my butt has become numb as concrete isn't very comfortable. Time to go. If you are reading this right now, I highly encourage you to find 20 minutes at some point in the day and just sit. Somewhere by yourself where no one will talk to you and all you have to think about is thinking about nothing. Music helps a lot to. Play your favorite cd, or something relaxing. Suggestions include but are not limited to:

Sigur Ros - Takk
- Agaetis Byrjun
Jimmy Eat World - Chase This Light
- Futures
Copeland - You Are My Sunshine
- Beneath Medicine Tree
- In Motion
- Eat, Sleep, Repeat
Anberlin - New Surrender
Acceptance - Phantoms
The Juliana Theory - Understand This Is A Dream
Minus The Bear - Planet of Ice
The Spill Canvas - Sunsets and Car Crashes
Superdrag - Headtrip In Every Key
The Postal Service - Give Up
Eisley - Room Noises
Mae - The Everglow
The Starting Line- Make Yourself At Home
Rae Cassidy (No CD yet, just a myspace)

That's my relax cd collection in order of most relaxing to kind of relaxing. I highly encourage you to buy all of them.


Good night notebook.