Does anyone think for themselves anymore?

I think I am becoming a recluse. And maybe that's not such a bad thing. Except for the fact that my already extremely lacking social skills will further be diminished. But if you know me at all...I don't really care. While I'm still just as immature as I was when I was 15, sitting alone reading a book is becoming more appealing than going out and partying with friends. And I think it's because I'm trying to shelter myself from things. Which I believe is not a good thing. I believe that part of being a Christian is learning how to interact and love everyone, regardless of their beliefs. Why am I holing myself up in my room rather than going out? Most likely because I'm sick of the world. Sick of people. Sick of religion. Sick of the church. Sick of being let down, defeated, and reminded that I am lost. Meanwhile my bed and a good book is a comfort zone. It's a place where I can get away from the world and my problems. But there is not a single place in this world where you can go to get away from everything. So why spend my time trying to find it? I don't know the answer to that. Or anything for that matter. I wish I could find that one person who I could just talk to at any time about anything. And not just someone who will listen, but someone who will process it. Someone who believes in something...anything. Someone who whole heartedly believes in something for their own reasons. Everyone is so caught up in everyone else's opinions, they can't form their own. Some Christians don't even know why they are Christians except for the fact that, A. Their parents are, B. Their friends are, or C. They want to fit in. It seems as if the world is becoming so wrapped up in "fitting in" with everyone else's opinions that they don't have their own. They believe what everyone else believes. They fight against what other people fight against. They don't seek truth, but acceptance. For example Christians shun homosexuals. If you are a Christian among most churches, you are expected to hate them. Maybe hate is a strong word, but definitely on the opposite side of the spectrum from love. Meanwhile Jesus constantly talks about loving your enemies as friends. Now, this being a very straightforward example, it goes to show how naive people are today. Love might be talked about in the bible more than anything else. Don't quote me on that...I haven't memorized it. But it's talked about quite a lot. And that's probably something that the church lacks the most. Love. So simple, yet we've been conformed to dislike and shun those that aren't like us.
This is an example of why I don't want to get out of bed in the morning. I'd rather sit in the safety of my seclusion than go out and watch a world of mindlessness. If the church can't grasp the love of God, then how can anyone else? If Christians don't know why they believe in God than how can I share with people that don't? But that's something I should probably work on. The world isn't getting any better. And I can't stay in bed all day. Although it would be nice. Oh and someone would have to feed me.